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The second poem actually gives quite a bit of insight regarding his situation. Translation from Chinese to English is hard and much is lost in translation. I'll translate the following to prose as to minimize what's lost in the translation:

《冲突》 "Conflict"

他们都说 They all say

我是个话很少的孩子 I'm a child of few words

对此我并不否认 This I don't deny

实际上 But actually

我说与不说 Whether I speak or not

都会跟这个社会 With this society I'll still

发生冲突 Conflict

"They've always told me that I was a quiet child. I do not deny that fact, however, whether I speak up or not doesn't alter the fact that I feel incompatible with this society."

The main beef I have with the translation is that conflict is a very explicit word whereas Chinese is much more implicit. It's pretty obvious that there was a large disconnect with what he wanted out of society vs reality. This is unfortunately quite common in China.

Being someone who grew up reading Chinese novels extensively, I can attest that the culture itself is heavily romanticized and when compared to the modern subversion influenced by the communist party, it's figuratively night and day.



My translation, trying to preserve the imagery expressed in some of the characters and also the rhythm of poetry in Mandarin,

《冲突》 "Collision, Rushing to a"

他们都说 The people are always talking, speculating

我是个话很少的孩子 That I'm a man-child, a little bit morose, have little to show for in the discipline of twisting tongue

对此我并不否认 To their accusation I won't deny nor recant,

实际上 But I'll instead declare that in reality, (not on their verbal plane),

我说与不说 I choose to speak to not speak - might as well cut my tongue,

都会跟这个社会 I have computed all possible scenario's of their word games and foresaw,

发生冲突 All interactions rushing on the freeway, en-route to their collisions.


As a native Chinese speaker, I would contend "conflict" is a more suitable word choice.

In Chinese, he doesn't qualify the final three sentences as his own feeling. The phrase "I feel" in English is usually used to indicate uncertainty/lack of objectivity. Instead, he uses "都会", whose strength, certainty and sense of inevitability are better represented by "I will" or "I'll" in English. In Chinese, the final line is a verb. By using the verb form of "conflict" as the last word in English as is done in the Chinese, the correct emphasis is placed on "conflict" as it is done on "冲突".


His poem "On My Deathbed", which the article opens with, reminds me a bit of this one by Hai Zi, another Chinese poet who took his own life: http://greenteadoodles.wordpress.com/2010/09/30/hai-zi-mysti...




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